I had a thought just now, that puts this into simple terms how I deal with this: A. As a member of my community, I can get involved in a conversation about issues in someone's life, offer advice and share experience. B. When I wear the admin hat, however, that has to be set aside. We often say in my private mod forum sections: "Put on your mod hat." Meaning, to set aside any personal feelings and/or relationship with the person aside, and look at their actions objectively. Case A is the human part of us as part of a greater community. Case B is the part of us who must act as an impartial judge - not to advocate or prosecute.